Choctaw Nation Foster Care asks tribal members to open their hearts and homes

A sad fact of the world is that sometimes children are separated from their birth parents. These separations can happen due to a variety of reasons, such as neglect, witnessing domestic violence, living in unsafe conditions, or being exposed to active drug use.

When a referral is made, the case is investigated to see if the allegations are true, whether the concerns can be remedied with resources, and if it is necessary to remove the child from the situation.

Robert Whitfield, a foster care recruiter with the Choctaw Nation, said, “When it is necessary to remove a child from their home, we always first try to place them with a safe family member.”

One of the primary goals of the foster program is to support reunification with biological families whenever it is possible and safe.

Sometimes, that takes time as that parent works through the process of getting their children back. Foster families fill that gap until everybody is certain the children are returning to a safe environment.

“These foster homes keep these children temporarily as we work with the family to make efforts towards reunification,” said Whitfield.

According to an Oklahoma Department of Health Services report released in 2020, of the 7,452 children in state custody, 2,567 were Native American. Across the nation, Native American children remain disproportionally affected. When compared to non-Natives, tribal children are four times more likely to come into custody. Additionally, many are separated from their culture as they are placed in non-tribal homes.

The Choctaw Nation prides itself on taking care of its own, as evidenced by the vast number of services it provides its citizens. Yet, when it comes to the citizens taking care of their own in the form of foster care, that isn’t always the case.
According to Whitfield, as of December 2024, only 42 Choctaw families had stepped up to be foster homes. The number of children needing a temporary home greatly outweighs the number of homes available.

December numbers showed that nearly 700 Choctaw children were in the foster system nationwide.

Eighty-two of those children are in the custody of the Choctaw Nation, while over 300 Choctaw children are in the custody of the state of Oklahoma alone.

Unfortunately, not every Choctaw child in the state’s custody is placed with a family member or in a Choctaw home. Many of our children still need Choctaw families to care for them.

Types of foster care

Whitfield said that many people think of foster care in a traditional sense. “Traditional foster care is where an individual doesn’t know the child, and they’re willing to open their home and their lives, to let the child in and keep them temporarily.”

However, Whitfield explained that there are other types of foster care.

Kinship foster care is where there’s a pre-existing relationship, such as a relative who knows the child or a family friend who has a substantial relationship with the family.

Emergency foster care is unplanned, typically late at night or on weekends.

Whitfield said, “Emergency foster care is often used when we’re trying to get a family member approved for kinship care, but we’re not able to get them through fast enough for that child to go there right then and there.”
Those emergency homes typically step up and take that child for the length of time it takes to get the family member approved.

The shortest type of foster care is respite care.

Homes that offer respite care are primarily focused on sharing their homes for brief periods. This can be when other homes need breaks or when something occurs that would require them to be away for a short period of time.
Part of the process of being approved to be a part of the foster care program is a home study.

This is where each family’s strengths and preferences are reviewed and discussed.

Kat Vorhees, a foster specialist with the Choctaw Nation, said, “That’s the beautiful thing about our program; you get to have that conversation about what you as a parent are the most comfortable with.”

Approval to be a foster family usually takes a minimum of 90 days.

There’s training for prospective foster families, a background check, and in-home inspections.

“Our families that foster have a variety of different backgrounds, life experiences, and household compositions,” said Whitfield. “We work to ensure that all have safe backgrounds and a willingness to care for our children.”

According to Vorhees, if you feel a calling to foster a child but think you or your family won’t qualify, the best thing to do is contact the foster care office and talk with them.

Pray about fostering

Fostering is a strong calling for many people.

According to Olivia Hensley, fostering children was something her family prayed about for a long time. “The Nation has done a lot for me throughout my life, so it [fostering] is a way to give back to the Nation,” said Hensley. “We enjoy interacting with our church kids and getting to influence them and be part of their lives. So, we decided this is a larger extension of that, being able to be part of kids’ lives for the long term, short term or whatever they need.”
Hensley’s extended family had a say in the fostering idea before they even started the process.

“My parents and my husband’s parents, we’re close with all of them. They all live literally down the road, both ways. We also checked with my grandparents, my siblings, my husband’s siblings because we wanted them to understand they’re going to be part of our home and our family,” said Hensley.

Bringing children into a strange home is never going to be easy, both for the adults and the children. The training offered by the Choctaw Nation helped Hensley and her family to prepare, but she says it was still somewhat of a shock the first time.

“We were sitting on our floor. It was pouring rain. It was nine o’clock at night, and they had brought us two little girls, both under the age of two; one of them was just a few months old,” said Hensley. “They were shell shocked, and we were shell shocked.”

However, it didn’t take long for the Hensleys to start treating them as they would their own kids: get them fed, bathed and put to bed. Hensley said her foster kids usually sleep well at first, “These foster kids sleep really well, especially when they first get here. They’re shocked and sleep because I know they’re exhausted.”

That first placement with the Hensleys lasted four nights. During that time, Hensley says they definitely got attached to the girls, and it was emotional letting go when they were placed in a kinship foster.

Vorhees says one reason she often hears that someone doesn’t want to get involved with fostering is that they don’t want to get attached. That’s exactly what makes a great foster family, though.

“If something were to happen with your family or your home and your children needed to go stay somewhere else for a little bit, wouldn’t you want the people that are going to go stay with to be attached? To make sure that they’re fed, get to school on time, feel safe, and feel loved. And then, as soon as your home is rebuilt, or you’re better, you’d want your children to come home to you,” said Vorhees. “We want more foster families to support that. And when people tell me I don’t want to get attached, I think to myself, good, I need you to get attached.”

Hensley says that as mature adults, we should be able to do that for the sake of children.

“We can deal with the loss of a kid being in our home, loving them and then having to give them up. These kids don’t have other options. They’re not there by choice. They’re there because they’re told to be; they have to be,” said Hensley.

That attachment, love and care can lead to a life-long impact.

Cheri Battle started fostering because she wanted to impact kids’ lives. She wants them to know that their experiences don’t define them.

“Your trauma doesn’t define you,” said Battle. “You can change your narrative.”

Battle, just like Hensley and Vorhees, says it’s okay to get attached.

“I form a bond, but I keep in mind that they will leave one day, depending on how their case goes,” Battle said. “So, I try to keep that in my mind.”

Battle has lost contact with only a few of her foster kids. She says they’ll sometimes call or video chat with her to see how she is.

“I’ll always ask them one question,” said Battle. “How are your grades? They know I’m big on education, making good grades and following the rules.”

Battle and other foster families bring structure and care to these children’s lives, which can truly make a difference. Seeing that has made all the struggles worth it to Battle.

Resources are available

“I don’t think people realize that you’re not paying for childcare, you’re not paying for medical care, and you get a monthly reimbursement from the state,” Vorhees said. According to Vorhees, other common misconceptions are that you have to be married or can’t work and foster simultaneously. Vorhess says you absolutely can and that they accept all family types. Many people don’t know that they have choices when it comes to foster care.

“You get to tell us what gender you’re most comfortable with, what age range you’re most comfortable with, the behaviors you will accept, and the behaviors that may be a hard no,” said Vorhees. When families have that conversation with the foster care program, it gives them a well-rounded understanding of what makes you and your family comfortable. “We know what type of child can be put into your home, and it be successful, which reduces the amount of moves that child needs to make. And that’s just a big win for everybody,” Vorhees said.

With the Choctaw Nation Foster Care program, you have a whole team helping you and the child. “When you have a child that comes into your home, you have a worker that works with the child; they’re on the child’s team. They’ll go to court. They work with the bio parents. They’re working on this child’s case. But, then, you have a person like me,” said Vorhees. “I’m on the foster parent’s team and working on everything that has to do with that parent.”

Reunification is the goal

While adoptions of foster children do happen, Vorhees says it’s not something that should be a goal if you’re considering being a foster parent. Getting the children back with their birth parents is the ultimate goal.

Vorhees told a success story of a mother who was reunited with her kids. “A mother was involved in a domestic violence situation. Their living conditions were deplorable. We received a call that someone was concerned about two children and their well-being. Our team did an investigation and took custody,” said Vorhees.

The abuser went to jail that night, but the mother was devastated. “Our Family Violence Program stepped in to work with her through court appearances, restraining orders and finding housing. Our tribal CPS team worked with her to ensure she finished her classes and abided by the case plan goal to get her children back,” Vorhees said.

Throughout this, the mother was consistent with visits and communicated well with the foster parents. “Eventually, she did it. She completed everything our tribal judge required; she maintained housing and a job, and her children were returned home,” said Vorhees.

When you step back and look at it, 42 isn’t a very big number compared to the number of loving Choctaw families on the reservation and across the state. In a video posted on the Choctaw Nation website, Chief Gary Batton, in a conversation with Vorhees, challenged Choctaw tribal members to step up and participate. “We take care of our own, and that’s something we need to live up to. Cousins, aunts, uncles, there are plenty of people out there, please, just help us,” said Batton.

“I would like nothing more than to have more homes than children that come into custody. I would like to get that complaint that, hey, we haven’t gotten a call from you in a while. I would like to have so many homes that we’re not having to sit up, late at night, making calls to find one bed,” said Vorhees. “At the end of the day these kids just want to feel safe, they want to play, they want to go to school, and they just want to feel loved. That’s what we need, some safe, stable, loving homes that would be willing to open their hearts.”

According to Whitefield, the question to ask is, “If not you, then who?” Many qualified Choctaw homes could take on a little extra, be it for a weekend, a week or something a little longer.

Currently, the Choctaw Nation Foster Care program is able to support homes in Oklahoma and some areas of northern Texas and western Arkansas within 60 miles of the reservation. “As the need for foster homes is nationwide, families residing outside of these coverage areas are encouraged to contact their local child welfare agencies for more information about fostering in their area,” said Whitfield.

If you’re in an area supported by Choctaw Nation Foster Care and have just a little extra love, reach out to the Choctaw Nation Foster Care office to see if foster care is right for you.